No resolutions for me this year. It’s all lifestyle.

Say what? No resolutions?

Come Again? No resolutions? Why not?

Seriously, the New Year is supposed to be about goal setting, right? So why wouldn’t I create my own resolutions for a new and improved me? Perhaps I like the person I am and can accept that I have some issues, but who doesn’t?

Resolution -a firm decision to do or not to do something. For some of us, a resolution is motivating, for others it signifies a set up for failure. We have been told since we were kids to create goals, which will empower us to move forward towards achievement. However, some of us fail from the get go…and we use that failure to create more guilt and excuses to stay stuck. It’s a never ending cycle of excitement – failure – guilt.  Just look at the gyms. January is their busiest month and all of the regulars know that by March, things will get back to normal, as the majority of the new members will stop coming in.

Lifestyle changes

We absolutely know what we need to do to be healthier.

  1. Move your body – stop being a couch potato. Honestly, your couch may miss you, but it will welcome you back when you return. It may even enjoy the time to itself. Take the stairs, park far away from the door, walk around the block, walk the dog.
  2. Eat well – this is a no brainer. For me, I have learned that sugar and carbs are not my friends. Too much of them and my joints swell, causing pain throughout my body. I have never been a great nutritional eater, so I rely on supplements that I trust…those with no artificial fillers and are plant based.
  3. Drink water. Yes, water. Coffee doesn’t count, nor does alcohol. Aim for 1/2 your body weight in ounces per day.
  4. Sleep – now that’s a tough one. While I personally love to sleep, my body isn’t very good with getting the REM that I need.  This is a continual challenge.

We know this, so where is the disconnect?

It begins in the mind

 

Mine is multifaceted. First and foremost, I want to keep up with my boys. Furthermore,I don’t want to be the mom who sits on the sidelines, just watching. I want to play, bike and have adventures with them. I also know that I FEEL better when I eat better. Additionally, I have anxiety, and working out helps that energy to focus in a positive way. Not to mention, genetically, we have heart disease in my family, and after losing my brother and mom to this disease, I want to fight back.

Self Motivation

You have to be self motivated. External motivation will not last. You can’t get healthier for someone else;  you need to do it for yourself. And you know what? YOU ARE WORTHY of being healthy and happy. You owe it to yourself to take care of yourself, after all, YOU Can’t Pour From an EMPTY cup.

Personally, I love affirmations. They are all over my office walls. I wear them on my wrist and I have an app on my phone that I love, called I AM. In my younger days, I thought affirmations were a joke. Now, my older and wiser version knows better. All behaviors begin with your thoughtssuccess, affirmations

Furthermore, I have some kick ass music play lists. When I get ready to ride, I plug those suckers in and get lost in the beat. Recently, I rediscovered biking and it took me back to my childhood. Once I finally learned how to ride a bike, I was never far from one. I still love the freedom, the road crushing under my tires and the feel of air rushing my face.

I may also be a tad competitive with my Apple Watch friends…and myself.

Looking Back

As I was looking back on FB memories, I was taken aback by how many times I had documented that this next year would be MY YEAR…that each next year would promise something amazing! And while those amazing things may have occurred, the opposite also happened. The deaths of loved ones, the loss of jobs, the passing of beloved pets.

Life happened. And it took the wind out of my sails. My external motivation was removed, as was the internal motivation. Defeat, depression and despair were prevalent and I had two choices: Keep moving or stop.

I choose to keep moving forward.   

After all, this is a lifestyle that begins new every day, sometimes every minute. It is not a resolution, as I deserve more that an annual goal.

Uninspired, but still motivated.

Uninspired, but still motivated.

Uninspired

This is for you, my friend. To the woman who feels frustrated with her wellness. I am writing to the woman who rewards herself with that little piece of candy. Read on if you are the woman who hates looking in the mirror or you are the woman who refuses to have her pictures taken.
This is for you from me...🌟keep going 🌟you are worthy🌟and you are beautiful. Click To Tweet
I was there 11 months ago. Furthermore, I was fit but I wasn’t healthy. As a result, one day I decided to make some positive changes and I wrapped my mind around what I needed to do.
Consequently, nearly one year later, I can proudly show you my progress.

You CAN do this. Above all, I believe in you, even if you don’t believe in yourself quite yet.

My journey

My wellness journey is probably not so different than yours. Seems like I was always petite as a child, slim as a teenager and tiny into my 20’s. Certainly, for those reasons, I could eat what I wanted and while I worked out, I didn’t take my wellness very seriously. Consequently, I didn’t think about my wellness much at all…until my 30’s. 

Life as I knew it began to change as I could no longer eat what I wanted with little or no ramifications. Hence, I began to gain weight and lose muscle tone while the workouts I had been completing were no longer cutting it (pun intended). Ultimately, between grad school and being newly married, the weight kept coming and I felt like I was at a loss to stop it.

Pregnancy does change you

For those reasons, my pregnancies did a huge number on my overall wellness. I was not prepared for the total overhaul my body would go through with each baby, nor was I ready for the hormonal changes that occurred. Please don’t read this as a complaint, as I would not change one thing about my babies; in contrast, I just want to recognize the inability to bounce back as your body truly does change and most likely you will not return to your pre-pregnancy condition.

My stall continues

To be honest, I remember very little about my 40’s. Conversely, while I remember moments, the overall decade remains considerably foggy. Additionally, having my boys at the advanced maternal ages of 39 and 40 resulted in a split pelvis and ongoing hip pain. To complicate matters, I had carpal tunnel surgery on both hands when the boys were both in diapers, followed by injury after injury.

Additionally, I struggled with never-ending shin splints and stress fractures. Ultimately, I endured a complicated hand surgery shortly followed by three abdominal surgeries within 18 months. Because of these situations an ugly cycle of me starting a wellness journey, only to be derailed and starting over began. However, knowing what I do now, I see the error of my ways. First and foremost, I failed to stretch. Although, most importantly, I refused to eat well and I didn’t care what I put into my body.

As my boys grew and became more active, I also made a decision to become more active. Therefore, I empowered myself with knowledge and participated in trial and error. Ultimately, I am determined to be a part of my boy’s lives without just sitting on the sidelines. I want to be involved in their activities, and truth be told, I want to show them how it’s done. 

The defining moment

Even though I had changed my eating habits and carefully chosen my supplements and while I was working out four to five days per week, I was not seeing many positive physical changes. Above all, I knew I was stronger and more fit, however, I was aware that I could improve my overall wellness. Unfortunately, my blood pressure was high and I was still on the heavier side.

My friend asked me if I wanted to join her in the 21-day fix and I vehemently told her no. However, not one month later, I noticed that I was rewarding myself with candy whenever I came home from the gym. HUH. Seriously, it was like a light bulb went off and I decided that I was done.

I adopted the Keto lifestyle, but more importantly, I gave up sugar.

The ramifications? 11 months later and I am down 30 pounds. My joint pain is virtually nonexistent. I am no longer the hangry person I used to be. My dry eye went away. As a result, I have found muscle tone again and I am no longer a slave to the sweet tooth I have always had. 

Empower yourself

I will leave you with my own recommendations to #beabetteryou as I recognize everyone has their own journey to follow:

  1. Stop the comparison game. You are not the same as anyone else and I doubt you know the struggles they have endured, nor do they know yours. Do not, I repeat, do not compare yourself to the other moms, your co-workers, or the women at your gym.
  2. Love yourself. You are worthy of being loved. Treat yourself as you would a best friend who is struggling and grant yourself grace.
  3. Make yourself a priority. GASP. Generally speaking, women often take care of others before we meet our own needs. Ultimately, this backfires on us and we end up feeling exhausted and resentful. If you want to explore this topic more, please read “You can’t pour from an empty cup“.
  4. Ask for help. Reach out to others and ask for guidance. Find a trainer to help you at the gym. So many of us are afraid to step foot inside a gym because we feel overwhelmed and don’t know where to start. Suck it up, buttercup and make that appointment. You will feel empowered when you leave and come back standing tall!
  5. Take pictures. You need to be in the moment, regardless of how critical you are of yourself. Remember that your family and friends love you regardless of how you look, and unlike your impression of yourself, theirs isn’t based on your appearance. Not to mention, this is a huge way to monitor your progress.
  6. Check your hormone levels. So many of the women I know are struggling with hormone and/or thyroid levels. Please note that I am not a medical provider, however, I know from personal experience that both of these can wreak havoc on your body and mind.
  7. Love yourself. Worthy of a repeat. You are beautiful and a scale or a size does not define you. If you are working on your wellness, do it for YOU. The world tells us we need to look or be a certain way and that is ridiculous. I have spent way too much time comparing myself to others and berating myself because I don’t’ look like I think I am supposed to. Embrace who you are in this moment.

I will leave you with this quote: “Courage is moving forward in times of non-motivation.” I receive daily motivation from Constantly Varied Gear, which is a kick-ass group of badass women who are pushing themselves and one another to be their absolute best. I found them on FaceBook. Check it out and let them know I sent you!

I am uninspired!

Embracing 50: age is just an illusion

Embracing 50: age is just an illusion

 

Age is an illusion

Or is it? As a freshman in high school, I thought the seniors were old…and by seniors, I meant the 17 and 18-year-olds!   I would panic when a senior even looked at me and my young self, as the age of 18 was technically an adult! Furthermore, someone in their 20’s was fricken ancient, which made anyone near 50 a senior citizen!  Needless to say, back then, I  was also that woman who was not going to get married, nor was I going to have children. I was going to complete my Ph.D. and take care of the world.

Ah, best-laid plans, right?

My 20’s

This decade was an extension of my teens, albeit while attending college. Looking back, I can’t imagine how I would have prospered if I had actually studied more and partied less. I honestly don’t know where the energy came from, as all I did was worked, studied and went out. Repeat. And repeat again.

The transition to adult employment was less tragic than I would have imagined. It turns out I was pretty good at what I went to school for (who would have thought). And amazingly, I could live easily it up at night and work all day! I moved into my first apartment, purchased a pack of smokes and a six pack and consumed both while sitting in front of my giangantuaous platform tv watching Beverly Hills 90210 (I didn’t smoke, just like the independence). Suddenly, I was a somewhat self-respecting grownup who paid my own bills and was fast realizing that there was more to the world than going out and being social.

My 30’s

As my friends began to settle down, I was still in denial that settling down was for me. I surrounded myself with others who loved to live life to the fullest and enjoy the world. I worked, worked out (less as I began to work more) and went out.  It was during one of those nights out that I picked up the phone and left a message for a long lost crush of mine (yes, it was one of THOSE calls). We all have that “one” that never leaves our mind or our heart. And after dating on and off since we were 16, we made the decision to move forward…together.

This was a challenge for this wild and independent girl. Now I was sharing a bathroom with a boy!  lol And we were making plans for a future…together (gasp)! Thank the Lord that he was patient and understanding because anyone who knows me also understands that I am not the easiest person to be around.

We got a puppy…together…it was the ultimate commitment in my book. That is until he proposed.

My Mid 30’s

Chad and I were married at the same time that some of our friends were getting divorced. It always seemed as though I was in a different life stage than those around me, which was probably true, since I was the one to do things my way. About the time that Chad was settling into his profession, I decided to go to graduate school, still thinking I would pursue my Ph.D. I did get my Master’s; however, I stopped there, as our priorities changed when we had our first son at the age of 39.

For the midwest, 39 is really pretty old to be having a baby. So not only did we endure the whole “Advanced maternal age” comments within my chart, my body was pretty shocked at what I was asking it to do.  This pregnancy knocked me on my ass and bedrest soon took me out of the world, but it was all worth it.

And this woman who wasn’t going to have kids? She became a stay at home mom.

The 40’s

So, if 39 is old to have a baby, our prayers were answered when we had our second son at 40. Truth be told, this decade is a blur. Two babies, four dogs, three moves to two different states and three different homes. Multiple surgeries, multiple injuries, hormone changes, weight changes…blah, blah, blah.

My 40’s were dedicated to my failing body and raising my boys. For someone who was never going to have a family, I can’t imagine my life any other way. I don’t believe we have kids to teach them the ways of the world, I believe we are given children so they can teach us. Watching the world through my children’s eyes is simultaneously amazing and terrifying. These boys reminded me there is more to the world than what I was focusing on, and thank God for that.

This is 50

50 is a time of rebirth for me. The boys are getting older and more active, just like their mom. 50 is when I give myself permission to be selfish and focus on me. It’s time to get back to basics by making my wellness a priority and learning to say no to what doesn’t feel good. It’s a time of discovery and soul searching. If you need help on this journey, please see this previous blog post I wrote.

For me, it’s a time for reflection and asking God where He wants me. After seeing so many of my family members and friends leave too soon, I vow to never take a birthday for granted. Where I used to cry on my birthdays, now I embrace the opportunity for another day with my loved ones. So, thank you, Lord, for your work in me.  I am excited to see where you lead me next as I step out of my comfort zones. After all, God has never left me through this adventure and I trust He knows the next chapter of my story.

I just need to stop trying to take control of the journey.

 

 

Wellness…there is no magic pill…or is there?

Wellness…there is no magic pill…or is there?

Wellness

Girlfriend (or guyfriend),

It took time to put on weight. Getting out of shape didn’t occur overnight, furthermore, you didn’t become a couch potato within a week. I know you want to get in shape quickly, however that probably isn’t going to happen.

Why?

Because there is no magic pill.

However, there are some things that can help. Ready?  Here are my recommendations for improving your overall wellness.

Water

THIS IS ESSENTIAL! Too many people substitute sugary drinks for water. Doing this sends you on a crazy emotional and energy roller coaster! For a short time, you have energy burst; followed by the crash, which sends you into a cycle of doing it all over again. Your sugar levels spike, you become full of cravings and you want to sleep while drinking more sugar!

Stop the madness! Drink water for improved overall wellness. I always tell my customers to aim for 1/2 their body weight in ounces per day. Add Crystal Light Pure, lemons, or cucumbers. Just drink your water! By doing this, you will decrease your hunger, minimize headaches and actually feel more energized!

Sleep

Ask virtually anyone you know how they sleep and I can pretty much guarantee that they will tell you they don’t. Furthermore, few people make it a priority. With to-do lists that stretch five miles long, we tend to stay up later and get up earlier. But what happens in between those hours?

Nothing.

Nada.

We can’t turn our mind off. Every little anxious thought comes to mind and we lie there wondering how to complete everything on our to-do list. If you need help turning off those old tapes, check out a previous blog post I wrote. We think about the project we didn’t complete or the upcoming opportunity. We put together our grocery list and try to figure out when we will fit in time to even see our spouse.

Lack of sleep creates added stress and increases our level of cortisol. An unfriendly little hormone that likes to hang around our middle. try setting a schedule and sticking to it, meaning go to bed and get up at the same times every day. You may also try Melatonin, another little hormone that tends to decline with each decade and a little bit help the sleepies come quicker.

Move

Get

off

your

ass.

Remember going to gym class in school? Why did they have that class? It wasn’t to torture us (although I am convinced that some of my gym teachers enjoyed that). They were trying to instill the importance of movement and exercise for our overall wellness. We have had this ingrained in our heads since we were in kindergarten, yet somewhere on our journey, working out became a chore.

Make yourself a priority. Studies show that walking around the block can raise your endorphins. Step out into the sunlight and get some Vitamin D. Take a Zumba class, ride a bike, or walk your dog. Do something. Exercise is critical for your emotional and physical health and will help you decrease stress levels, thus decreasing your cortisol levels. An added benefit is that movement will help you sleep better.

You are what you eat

I remember this tag line from my childhood. At that time I thought it was bunk and looking back, I would have been Nacho Cheese Doritos and Diet Mountain Dew! It took me many years to realize the truth behind this tagline though. When I eat like crap, I feel like crap and have minimal energy. What you put into your body is critical and will determine how your body looks and feels.

I am still not the best nutritional eater and I rely on supplements. Again, you have to do your homework and know what is in those supplements. I look for non-gmo, no artificial fillers, and a reputable company. Today, there are so many options, it is often difficult to know where to start. If you need help, go here and look around to see some viable and bioavailable options.

Accountability

Share your goals with your friends and family. Writing them down and declaring them helps to hold you accountable. Opening yourself up to others also provides opportunities for them to support you. Remember, you are not on this journey alone, nor should you try to improve your overall wellness on your own.

We are stronger together.

Own it

There is absolutely nothing in this blog that you have not already been told. You know what you need to do and all of the external influence and motivation will not help you if you are not doing something for yourself. Improved wellness begins with one little change and builds confidence and self-love. When that one little change gets comfortable, add another.

There is no magic pill, however, stay tuned for something that may be the next best thing!

 

Hormones – It’s not all in your head!

Hormones – It’s not all in your head!

 

What is wrong with me?

Fatigue. Mental Fog. No libido. Disappearing lean muscle. Do any of these sound familiar?

I am talking about real fatigue, like the kind where you can’t keep your eyes open in the afternoons, even after laying in bed for 8 hours the previous night. Notice I didn’t say you slept the previous night, and chances are you weren’t having sex either, because you are just so fricken exhausted!

And mental fog? Listen, I know that we all walk into a room and forget why we went in, but this kind of mental fog is a tad more extreme...its the kind where you need your vitamins in a daily display case so you can remember if you… Click To TweetIt’s the  check your toothbrush kind to see if it’s wet because you can’t remember if you already brushed your teeth today.

Let’s be real, as much as you love your son’s overstuffed bear, you really don’t want to BE ONE. Where in the F__K is all the fluffiness coming from? You work out, you eat well and the muscle keeps melting away. You have a whole closet full of clothing that you can’t wear and you really don’t want to purchase the bigger sizes.

WTF?

My story

While my story may begin differently than yours, my frustration may be the same. I had my children at the ages of 39 and 40 (gasp). Following the birth of my second child, I had surgery on both of my hands…shortly after I healed, I began working out and kept injuring myself; which derailed me every time I started getting momentum. It also left me feeling defeated.

Within 18 months, I had three abdominal surgeries, including a hysterectomy and the recovery was awful. Actually, I am not sure I ever fully recovered from that final surgery. I was depressed, fluffy, exhausted and unhappy. Once again, I was determined to work out and signed up for a 5K. I began training with a friend and dropped some weight…until I experienced two stress fractures from carrying my child down a mountain in the rain…

Right?

Soon after, I began experiencing planar fascitits and after 18 months of therapy that included a boot, injections and physical therapy, they wanted to perform surgery.  Additionally, I had been experiencing extreme joint inflammation and I just fricken hurt. I HURT ALL THE TIME. My doctor took a blood panel, which showed a high ANC so she sent me to a neurologist, who diagnosed me with fibromalygia. I knew within my whole being that there was something else going on.

Hormones

Keep in mind, during these years, I was still a wife, a mom, and freelancer however I was exhausted. I could fall asleep anytime I sat down and my hips and joints just hurt. So I did some research and found a new doctor who took one look at me and tested my hormone levels. Turns out my testosterone was a whopping 17(that’s very very low, my friend). No wonder I was fluffy, exhausted and in pain.

After some research, I began taking bioidentiacal hormes and within two weeks, I was no longer needing an afternoon nap.  It took some time, but I began to feel like a real person again. Granted, there are some days that I feel better than others, but isn’t that with all of us?  I didn’t expect miracles, I just wanted to feel good again.

It’s not all in your head

As a trainer and empowerer, I am appalled at how many women struggle with this and are never given proper information. So many of us are given medications, instructed to eat less or told to work out more. All any of that does is bandage the problem. Honestly, when I was first introduced to bioidentiacal hormones, I was skeptical. However research shows that we lose our ability to create hormones with each decade…and as we are living longer, that often leads us to living miserably also.

Unfortunately, not every practitioner is open to testing for hormones, which in turn can be frustrating. Furthermore, even when they do test, insurance companies rarely cover the cost of bio identical hormones. I know women who have gone to physician after physician and have been diagnosed with a multitude of ailments, without ever having their hormone levels tested, let alone talked about.

Additionally, not all physicians test the same hormones, nor are the optimal levels consistent. No wonder we are all confused, right? And we can become peri menopausal in our 30’s, which may cause a change in hormones while we look completely fine. Rest assured my friend, it isn’t all in your head. If you know that something isn’t right, keep asking questions and demanding further testing. You deserve to look and feel your best at every age and you can’t pour from an empty cup.

 

What I learned about Keto in 50 days

What I learned about Keto in 50 days

I did something last month.

I drastically changed my way of eating (woe) by cutting carbs and eliminating sugar.

Yes, I went Keto and it isn’t something I did lightly. As with most things I fall in love with, I am initially skeptical. So, I researched, I talked to my practitioner, I connected with some good Keto pals…and I fricken went for it.

Why?  Because I was in pain. I ate too much sugar.  I experienced drastic mood swings. Because I was just plain tired. The final straw was when I jokingly admitted to the people I was training that I dipped my girl scout cookies into my protein shakes. Click To Tweet Yes, it was a joke, but it really happened and it happened often.

I had a problem and I needed an intervention. I already worked out and was developing lean muscle. I was taking my supplements. I still felt like shit.

What I learned in my first 50 days of Keto

  1.  I am an emotional eater.  I  often reached for food when I wasn’t hungry.  It became a habit. It was one of the first things I did upon walking through the door.  Just as I would remove my shoes, I would reach for something sweet.  If I was bored, I would walk into the kitchen and search aimlessly for something that spoke to me. If I awoke in the middle of the night, I would grab a snack; not because I was hungry, but because I was awake and I wanted something to soothe my restless soul.
  2. I was addicted to sugar. Trust me, this is a real thing. I used to joke that I would dip my girl scout cookies into my protein shake…however, the truth is, that wasn’t a joke. I loved the bite-sized Snickers and could rationalize the small size meant fewer calories AND the peanuts were protein. It’s amazing the games we play with our own minds.
  3. I needed the support from others. While I chose to jump into this lifestyle, I truly needed the knowledge and support from others. Not only does that keep you accountable, it creates a reality check. I would reach out to my girlfriend and continuously ask questions and bounce things off of her. I checked into several FB groups often, just to make sure I was on the right track.  I also utilize a pretty cool app called Senza, to track my macros (look, I got the lingo down).
  4. It was easier than I thought it would be. I really don’t miss anything at all.  I still eat pizza, however now I eat the toppings, after all, that’s the good part anyway. I eat pickle and lettuce sandwiches. I eat natural peanut butter and sugar-free chocolate chips. I absolutely admit to being a work in progress, however, I am open to learning, so I guess you CAN teach an old dog new tricks!
  5. I feel AMAZING!  My inflammation is gone. My bloating is gone. I am down 15 pounds and can fit into clothing I haven’t worn for years. My energy level is good and I no longer suffer from carb naps or sugar spikes.

It isn’t for everyone

I am not a clinician. I would not suggest everyone do this. I am a mom who wanted to take control of her life and reign in the poor habits. My favorite daily treat was a smoothie at Juice Stop that I thought was healthy. That smoothie had over 40 carbs in it, therefore I suffered a carb crash every afternoon and had to have something to energize me. The roller coaster was awful and I could not get stabilized.

As I previously mentioned, I did reach out to my clinician and she approved it. She agreed that it would help even out my hormone levels and eliminate my sugar spikes. While I have received some negative feedback from concerned friends, the majority of people have been very supportive. ON a side note, I refuse to call this a diet as that word connotates such negativity in my mind and once I say I am on a diet, I play horrible head games with myself. This is a lifestyle and this is my lifestyle choice.

Some things the helped the transition

My company had recently launched some Keto products. Of course I was skeptical, however, I did try them. (I like to try everything we have so I can guide others on their own journey). Surprisingly I loved the Keto Coffee. It fills me up all morning and gives me incredible energy! With the grass-fed butter, collagen, and MCT Oil already built in, all I have to do is dump it in cold water, froth and enjoy.

Additionally, when you adopt this lifestyle, you will go through the Keto Flu. I now know that you need to increase your electrolytes, which can be done with Himalayan Sea Salt and/or Mio Sport (some people balk at this, however, since this is my blog, this is my opinion).  Drink your electrolytes as it will help tremendously! While you will feel like shit for awhile, this too shall pass and it will be worth it.

Take before and after pics and measure! I didn’t do either, so do what I suggest, not what I did, lol. You will be amazed at how much your body will change. The scale may move quickly initially as your body releases water from your fat cells, however, this too will slow down as you become fat adapted.

As you see your progress, you will become more motivated for success. My husband has supported me on this journey and is slowly adapting to my way of eating. Admittedly, it is a drastic change in thought process, as you have to let go of all the “truths” you have believed for years, but it is so worth it. The bottom line is that I feel more confident, more energetic and happier…and at the end of the day, isn’t that what we all want?

What are your thoughts?  I would love to know what has worked for you and what you need help with!  Email me and let’s chat!