Dreams are for Quitters

Dreams are for Quitters

Are you a dreamer?  Do you still have dreams for your future or did you allow your ability to dream to die when you began “adulting”. Why is it that as child, almost all of us were told we can be absolutely anything in the world, but as adults, we are pigeon holed into a specific  category.  First of all, who decided that? And why did we think it was OK to go along with that plan?  Seems like we are the ones who have lost out.

Have you ever just sat quietly and listened to children play?  I love when they engage in dramatic play and allow themselves to stray off into unknown worlds.  They aren’t limited by conceptual thinking…therefore, they don’t care if someone tells them that is impossible…children believe in their world and as a result, they bring it to life!

Dreams

This is not about the dreams we have when we sleep.  I am talking about the deepest pull within your soul telling you to do more and to be more.  Think back to when you were a child.  What did you want to be when you grew up? I initially wanted to be a singer…unfortunately, I can’t carry a tune, but I still sing loudly and proudly.

I also wanted to be a writer, but you know what?  I gave up on that dream for years.  Hence, I got lost in the world of expectations and let my dreams flit away.  Every once in a while, I would write a poem or newsletter article and every time I did, that fire started burning a little stronger.  One day I couldn’t suppress that dream anymore and I took a chance on a job interview and history was changed. Today, I still want to write a book, and as a result,  I believe that is going to happen. However, had I suppressed my dreams, seems like I would be blocking out a large portion of who I am.

Rekindle Your Fire

If you have let your flame burn out, you can get it back.  How?

  • Rekindle your romance with your passion.  Think back to what makes you come alive and do that!
  • Allow yourself some downtime to just BE.  Stop over-scheduling yourself with things you don’t want to do and events your don’t want to participate in.  Say no to others and yes to yourself.  Just BE and allow your thoughts to wander…what are you drawn to?
  • Revisit a craft.  Are you musically inclined?  Do you enjoy coloring? Are you a great singer? Did you used to journal? Do it again! Pick up the pencil, hum a tune, or go build something!
  • Take a class.  Sign up for a pottery or painting class.  Challenge yourself and revisit your senses, therefore allowing yourself to travel back in time and open those  locked doors within yourself.

Love Yourself

Too often we stop dreaming because we have convinced ourselves that we aren’t worthy of success.  Somewhere someone may have told us we weren’t good enough.  Don’t let someone else dictate your future, it’s not theirs to do so.  Allow yourself to dream and most of all, be kind to yourself.  Finally, God gave you a talent, consequently, it is your job is to tap into that talent and share it with others.

 

“Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Never limit yourself because of others’ limited imagination; never limit others because of your own limited imagination.”
– Mae Jemison

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”
– Eleanor Roosevelt

Weight Loss Warrior

Weight Loss Warrior

Sometimes you meet someone and you know they were put in your life for a reason.  I remember when I first met Alicia Fechtmeister; we were both standing outside Armbrust YMCA and I commented on how amazing she looked.  I had seen her around the Y and noticed she was working hard and her weight loss was showing dramatically in the shape of her face and the confidence she now bestowed.

I have watched this woman continue her weight loss journey for the past two years and she continues to be inspiring to those around her.  She supports her counterparts and she has become a contestant in early morning spin classes.

Today I talked with her about her wellness journey and what prompted her to change her lifestyle.  Alicia and Bob both graduated from Lincoln and began the American Dream.   With a business and five children ranging in ages from 5 – 16, they are incredibly busy.  While Bob is a runner, Alicia really didn’t participate in any wellness activities as she was focused mainly on keeping her large family up and running.

The Beginning

Three years ago, she took her two boys to watch Bob run the Lincoln marathon.  She saw a picture of her with Bob and the boys and she couldn’t believe that was actually her.  Many thoughts went through her mind, including:

“I don’t like how I look”…

“I didn’t like how I feel”…

“I wanted to look good for my husband (although she knows that he loves whatever size she is)”…

“I want to be healthy.”

The Journey

She didn’t want to wait until a doctor told her she needed to lose weight or until she suffered a heart attack to get into shape, so she made some changes in her life.   She and her family joined Armbrust YMCA and she started attending one class per week.  Shortly after that, she began the FAST program and learned about balancing what went into her body with what went out.  Soon after, she was all in.

Initially weighing in at 236, she upped her classes to 7 days per week.  Alicia found she loved spin class and combined with the FAST Program, she began to see changes in her weight and her body.  Alicia reports it was “liberating” to not have to shop in the fat aisle at the store!

bike-forever

During this time, her husband continued to run.  He and a friend were doing a 5K and asked her to join them.  She and her sister joined the guys and her sister kept pace with her until she completed her very first 5K!  That started a love/hate relationship with running.  To this day she still doesn’t love it, but it is something that she and Bob can do together.

run

Alicia has found continued support from her husband and her sisters, along with various members at the YMCA.  While her weight has fluctuated some, she continues on her journey and is the first to admit that she is not where she wants to be; this is not the end of her journey.

I didn’t ask her what her final goal is, I just shared that she continues to be a motivator for others.  This past weekend, Alicia ran the Lincoln ½ marathon.  Admittedly, this is not something she ever thought she would do and she finished strongly with a 12 ½ minute pace!  Bob ran by her side, supporting and encouraging her the whole way.  She says she is overwhelmed by the number of people who sent her texts and messages encouraging her along her run and didn’t realize how many people were pulling for her!

Giving Back

Ultimately, Alicia wants to give back.  She has invited other Y members to the Color Run with her and she has promised to run at their pace, just has Bob and her sister did for her.  Has she made an impact on her children?  Bob will say she has.   Last week their youngest child was on a workout machine and said:  look daddy, I’m getting healthier, I’m exercising, I’m just like mommy”.

You never know who you may be impacting or who may be observing.  As Alicia has learned, her journey just isn’t about her, but those who are watching and being motivated by her determination.

 

How Do You Fill YOUR Cup?

How Do You Fill YOUR Cup?

I see you.

I see what you refuse to acknowledge.  It shows in the puffy dark circles under your eyes and the lack of glimmer in eyes that once sparkled brighter than the stars.  I notice that you don’t smile as quickly as you once did and your step is not as springy as it used to be.  I also notice the hesitation in making eye contact, most likely out of fear that I will talk with you, forcing you to be polite and have a conversation with me. In the time it takes you to look my way, I see all of this.

I recognize the exhaustion and the overwhelming sense of commitment.  You are running on fumes, yet you continue to take on more and more in hopes of bringing everything together.  You say yes so you will not let others down.  You pitch in more so others may do less.  You give and give and give and at this moment, you are running on fumes.  cup-empty

I know, because I have been there.  Working multiple jobs, had an active social life, continued with ongoing education, attempted to fit in time to work out and tried to make time for my husband.  One huge factor is missing, do you know what it was?

Priorities

I didn’t make time for me!  Furthermore, I didn’t fill my cup because I was too busy filling everyone else’s.

The truth is, I didn’t focus on myself.  My cup was empty.  I felt guilty if I took an hour to get my nails done.  Followed by feeling guilty for getting a massage. I felt guilty if I told someone no, I couldn’t attend their event because I felt guilty being away from home.  My metaphorical cup was on fumes and was way past empty, I couldn’t even energize from the sporadic fumes. When I stopped moving, I was utterly exhausted and I would crash hard.  My emotions ran the gamut from being elated and passionate to being pissed off and full of resentment.  The smallest occurrence that deviated out of my control could throw me into a fit of rage.  Well, when you are as tenuous as I used to be, that “minor” event was enough to bring out the fricken beast in me.

I didn’t even like being with myself, I was so unpredictable.  For me, anger surfaces when I feel overwhelmed.  Anger is the easiest feeling for me to identify and work through and it has always been a great defense mechanism for me.  Looking back, it would have been easier to tell someone no, but that would also open the door for me to disappoint or anger them.

What made me change my priorities?

I became a mother.  Becoming a mom forced me to tell others no, as my priorities needed to be at home.  Conversely, that means I need to take care of myself and fill my cup with what makes me happy.  When mama isn’t happy, no one in the house is happy.  Like it or not, I am the one who sets the tone for the day and teaches my boys that they have the power to choose their attitudes.  I need to take the time to refill my energies, my passions, and lead by example.

If you pay attention when you are around children, you will begin to learn again through their eyes.  You will see the wonder in the world and allow your imagination to wander while exploring the dark places of your past that you haven’t visited in decades.  When you are around children, you remember what it is like to ask for what you need and to automatically tune into those needs.

Hungry?  Get a snack.

Tired?  Take a nap.

Energized? Bounce off the walls (lol, I have boys).

Feeling creative? Draw a picture.

See something beautiful?  Share it with others.

Children experience sheer joy at the things adults take for granted every day.  As we grow older, we lose site of that ability and often take for granted the healing and restorative impact of the world around us.  If a child doesn’t want to go to a friends house to play, they simply say no.  If a  child doesn’t want to play a specific game with their friends, they talk through it until they compromise.  Children freely reach for hugs and openly show affection without fear of rejection.

Fill your cup

Fill your cup, my friend.  Don’t allow yourself to get so overwhelmed that you or your glass shatters into a million pieces, making it so much more difficult to refuel.  Go for coffee with a friend, take in a movie, ask for date night, get your nails done, read that book.  I am giving you permission to say NO to more demands and to let go of any guilt in doing so.  You can’t do it all, nor should you.  Go out and fill your cup!

 

 

 

What is a Wellness Warrior?  One who exudes strength…

What is a Wellness Warrior? One who exudes strength…

What is the definition of a wellness warrior?

In my mind, a wellness warrior is someone who never gives up.

No matter what life throws at them, they brush it off, pull up their boot straps and stand tall, making eye contact with doubt, failure, and adversity.

It is someone who refuses to back down.

It is someone who refuses to stay down.

It is someone who takes their injuries, their surgeries, their letdowns, their grief, and they turn it into something positive.

To me, a wellness warrior is someone who refuses to stay down.

To me, wellness encompasses the physical, spiritual, emotional, and sexual aspects of a person.

In my opinion, to be whole, one must always strive to be healthier in all aspects.

Personally, I have long history of struggling with my own wellness.   Prior to being a mom, I never thought twice about what I put into my body, let alone how I cared for myself physically.  After having my children at the ages of 39 and 40 put a huge strain on me physically, and while I thank God daily for my boys, my body was not nearly as eager as my heart was for the experiences.

The next five years brought surgery after surgery and injury after injury.  Honestly, every time I began a work out regime, I would either end up in the hospital or injured.  It would have been easy to say “fxxk it”, I’m done.  However, I have two little boys and an amazing husband who depend on me.  I owe it to myself to get back into the game and show all of us that I am worth fighting for.

It is a personal decision for each and every one of us.  We need to ask our self what wellness warrior means to us.  We need to honestly assess whether we are where we want to be, physically, spiritually, emotionally, and sexually, and if not, we need to take the necessary steps to move forward.

After all, you are worth it!  However, until you believe that, you will stay where you are.

Are you ready to #beabetteryou?

I certainly am!  We are stronger together than we are alone.

 

stop playing the i can’t song

stop playing the i can’t song

I CAN’T do THAT!

I CAN NOT.

CAN’T!

Stop.  Just stop.  If only I could have you jot down a check mark for every time you allow yourself to think the words “I CAN’T”!  I would also like to have a dollar for every time you said those words out loud. I am pretty sure I would be rich. (more…)

One Man’s Dream Becomes His Family’s Epic Adventure!

One Man’s Dream Becomes His Family’s Epic Adventure!

One Man’s Dream Becomes His Family’s Epic Adventure!

Imagine doing that as an adult and not only have the support of your family, but having them go with you!  Dan McDonald has not only imagined it, he and his wife Brianne, made it happen!

For years Dan has ridden his bicycle.  He rode it to the University of Nebraska – Omaha during his undergraduate studies.  Later, he began exploring the Keystone Trail and going further and further each time he went out.  Eventually he began to travel by bicycle throughout Omaha and discovered the trails expand further than he ever imagined!

One day, while traveling for work he found himself in Pittsburgh, Kansas.  Sitting near him, he noticed a content looking gentleman who appeared to have his life packed onto his bike.  Dan later found out his fellow diner was traveling the TransAm Trail, which Dan immediately researched and decided he wanted to do the same!

He broached the idea of riding the TransAm Trail with his wife, Brianne and they tabled it for a few years.  With twin boys, school and work, it didn’t seem like a possibility.  Dan began longer rides and participated in RAGBRAI and BRAN.  He continued to increase the length and challenges of his rides and began to test his endurance.  When Dan found himself out of work during the summer of 2016, and while Brianne was completing her Master’s in Business, they made a decision that now was the time.  It was decided that Dan would ride across the United States on the TransAm Trail while his wife, twin boys and their dog followed behind in the truck and camper.

Detailed and intense planning began and together they researched their upcoming trip.  With the help of a check sheet they downloaded from the internet, the family began stocking up on necessities and planning out meals they could easily eat on the road.  Toiletries were purchased, rations were researched and the camper was packed.

On May 10th, after saving and planning, they began their journey and headed east to pick up the Trans Am Trail in Yorktown, Virginia.  On May 15th, beginning at the Atlantic Ocean, Dan geared up and began the ride of his life (to date).

hoosier pass

While Dan explored the world from two wheels, Brianne and the boys saw the world from four.  The family discovered the Cyclist Ministry, who provided a wealth of resources for their family. They provided meals, community information and often a place to shower or stay the night.  Utilizing their resources combined with those from the Trans Am Trail, they were able to plan ahead for their trip with trusted people who also had a passion for their journey.

The couple had a plan of action.  Dan would rise at 5:00 AM and pedal away while Brianne packed up camp.  With a predetermined mid-day meeting point, they would connect in person and more often than not, Brianne would make sure Dan had enough water and snacks to maintain his endurance for the rest of the ride.

Since cell service was touch and go, Brianne typically stayed on the paved roads and looked for landmarks or signs to guide her.  This proved to work well until the couple discovered that not all trails were marked.  Dan stuck to the maps and trail guides and took in the beauty of our country as he pushed himself each day.

His longest ride turned out to be about 110 miles, and while he averaged around 75 miles per day, as he explained to me, it was less about how far he could ride and more about how many days in a row he could continue to ride that far.  His biggest challenge typically turned out to be the last ten miles of each day, when he dug deep to find his strength.  He would meet his family at their designated meeting point and Brianne would make dinner while they visited and planned the next day’s route.

Any challenges turned out to be worth it, as this trip turned into an extended family adventure. Both parents couldn’t say enough about how their boys grew over the summer.  With limited access to the web, minimal toys, and a wide open playground, their unique personalities came out.  Brianne noted that she also relaxed over their journey and was able to enjoy their adventures.  As a person who loves driving through the mountains, this was a dream come true for her, considering she went through several different mountain ranges.

The family enjoyed many different experiences together; immersing themselves into the vast wildness and experiencing so many different socio-economic areas.  The small townships they encountered proved that people are still welcoming and willing to help.  They toured many National Parks and even came close to a small family of black bears!  These events are firsthand adventures their family will cherish as memories for their lifetimes.

For a family who was active together before marriage and a family, this provided something for everyone, including the dog.  They discovered that Ranger Stations are a traveler’s best friend and were a good grounding point when they found themselves out of their comfort zones.

With travels through Virginia, Kentucky, Illinois, Missouri, Kansas, Colorado, Wyoming, Montana, Idaho and Oregon, their trip ended when Dan dipped his bike tires into the Pacific Ocean outside of Seaside, Oregon.

hoosier pass

Nearly 4500 miles later, Dan, Brianne, their twins and four legged family member celebrated the completion of an amazing adventure.  This won’t be this family’s last adventure.  Biking continues to be a strong pull for Dan and Brianne would love to live in Alaska…who knows what their future holds?  Be sure to follow them via Facebook page, Go Seek Nature and their website, http://www.Goseeknature.com, where they hope to inspire others to get out into the great outdoors.

What an amazing adventure for this family.  They were able to create adventures, memories, and show their boys that anything is possible!  Keep on inspiring, McDonald family!  We look forward to more of your family adventures!

Photo credits, Dan and Brianne Mcdonald