by Cindi j Jeffrey | May 11, 2016 | Business owner, childhood, mom, work from home mom
Being a parent is similar to walking on a tightrope. You don’t want to overstep, loose your balance, or drop your ever important balancing stick. You hope you are providing your child with the tools to become confidant adults without losing your way. It’s a great thing that when we do fall, there is a safety net of others to pick up our slack.
My two boys are very different. It amazes me how two children, just 19 months apart can demonstrate such different characteristics! For one of my children, things come easily and he doesn’t seek out praise. My other child struggles with confidence issues and becomes easily frustrated, which leads to tears (I wish I could say he didn’t get this from me).
Today was a growth opportunity for that child. After a year of struggles in school, he tested well on reading. Actually, he breezed through six different reading levels this school year. In past years, he has chosen to be lacksidasical in his studies until the last quarter, where he would finish 3 quarters worth of work.
But I digress…tonight at Tae Kwando he began to cry when lost his way during a form. I immediately stood up and provided some encouragement from afar, wanting to go and hug him and knowing he needed to stay on the mat and finish his class.
From deep within, he mustered the courage to press on and completed the forms correctly. He stood taller and began to smile. He maintained that confidence throughout the class. As we left, we talked about how he felt class went, as we usually do. He talked of becoming frustrated and confused, however once he knew his expectations, he was able to bring it all together. I explained how proud I was of him that he stayed on the mat and even more importantly, he was proud that he stuck it out.
We both learned lessons tonight. He learned to trust himself and I learned to trust him. I thank God everyday for these little people and I pray that He will guide all of us through our journeys.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Apr 23, 2016 | Business owner, childhood, mom, work from home mom
Today’s world is so different from the world I grew up in. At the age of four, I was walking carefree and alone around our city block. By the time I was ten, my friends and I would walk across town to the mall. We spent our days outside and went hours without our parents hearing from us.
Today, I am afraid to let my boys play out front without an adult. There are reports of sexual predators attempting to lure kids into vans just blocks from our home. The news is packed with stories of shootings, attempted kidnappings, and other atrocious acts.
Some things have stayed the same though. There are still predators who are looking for their next victim. As a child I remember our family home being broken into. Although we locked the door, it was just a screen and was easily cut through. The thieves crawled right into my parents bedroom where they were sleeping and stole from us.
We had a peeping tom. I remember going out to look at the footprints in the mud outside of our downstairs window. Even with our home being violated, I still felt an essence of safety. Most of all, I remember the attack in the park bathroom when I was around the age of 7.
The city park boasted multiple play areas and a great river for fishing. Accompanied by my dad and older brother, I alternately played on the equipment and caught the trees with my fishing pole. When I told my dad that I had to use the bathroom, he instructed my brother to take me.
While he wasn’t overly happy about it, my brother walked me there as I chattered on and on about the fun we were having. When we reached the building, I attempted to open the heavy door and was unable to, so my brother assisted me in pushing it open…that was when we heard a piercing scream from a woman yelling “help me”!
Immediately my brother pulled me backwards and we let the door fall shut. Shortly after we moved out of the way, a man ran out. To this day I can tell you that he had dark hair, a white t-shirt, blue jeans and black boots. He also held a white cloth over his face.
My brother grabbed me and together we RAN back to where my dad was still fishing. As I was hysterical, my brother shared the story and we all piled into the truck so my dad could find a pay phone and call the police. During the drive around the park, we encountered the woman, now hanging over the river bank with blood dripping from her face. My dad let her know the police were in route.
I had to give my statement to the officers and we were free to go home. Home..where we had already been broken into…Home…where we had already been visited by a peeping Tom. Home…and a feeling of dread while wondering if I would ever be safe again.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Jan 27, 2016 | mom, school, work from home mom
We are defined by the words we associate with ourselves. I am a mommy. I melt when my boys say my name, even when it is the 400th time that day. I don’t take this position lightly. Allow me to address a situation that occurred in our life.
Earlier this week, my sensitive child came home from school thinking he was a “bad” boy. To say I was appalled is an understatement. Some of his classmates had been having difficulty and acting out and he was put into what he perceived to be the “bad” group.
He was visibly upset, as this is the child who follows the rules. He is kind to everyone, particularly those who don’t have many friends. He tries to maintain the status quo and doesn’t do a lot to stand out. He often fails to do his own work when a classmate asks him for help. I will not say that he hasn’t broken the rules, as he has. He has made some poor decisions, as we all have.
So for him to share that he was a “bad” boy was unacceptable. It is so easy to put someone down yet so hard to build them back up. His dad and I spent quite a bit of time talking with him about our expectations for him. I wish I could say this was the first time this has happened, but it isn’t. In the past we have had to talk with him about how he perceives the actions of others in regard to the reality of those actions.
For a sensitive child, overlooking positive behavior is detrimental. Even if he performs well, he relies on the feedback of others to feel better. A sensitive child does not have the internal drive that guides him do complete his work, or stay in his seat…he will always follow his inclination to help a classmate who needs assistance or to worry about everyone else.
It crushes my child if you forget to greet him in the morning. We work very hard on the way to school to prepare for the day and when he leaves the car to walk into the school, the direction of his day can often be determined by how high he holds his head.
He isn’t consistent in his work. Plese don’t ever confuse that with his level of intelligence. He doesn’t forget ANYTHING. His capacity for work is contingent upon how he feels about himself, OR how he feels about you, as his teacher. If there isn’t a connection, he will probably not perform at his highest. It takes him time to trust you and that trust is earned in regard to your interactions with him and with others.
He is a watcher. He notices who is in trouble and who does well. He notices that he has never been picked as student of the week. He tries to please you, and when you fail to acknowledge that, he will stop trying. As he begins to fall behind, he feels overwhelmed and eventually will stop trying.
He is 7. He needs to play. He needs a break from being “busy”. He needs to run and be silly. While he may not be as athletic as other boys, he loves to be around everyone. He is learning that he can’t throw a ball as good as someone else, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to.
There are things he excels at. Please take the time to ask him what he likes. It may take 2 minutes from your day, but I promise you, it will mean the world to him. Ask him how he feels and you will learn more about him that you ever knew. Don’t categorize him or any other child, for you only see the tip of who they are.
It hurts me to watch him walk into school when he feels like a “bad” boy. He is a little boy and he is still learning. I know that you have many students to watch over and you have an integral job of guiding who they will become. I understand that your day is chaotic and your job is sometimes thankless. Please take a moment and acknowledge my child as a person, as a little boy who wants to please you, as a little boy who is learning. We are trusting you to guide our child, please don’t take that lightly.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Jan 16, 2016 | mom, Wellness, work from home mom
I refuse to diet…after all if you look closely at the word, the first three letters are D I E. In my opinion, diets are a set up for failure. If your mind works like mine, once you try to restrict something from your life, that is all you will begin to think about.
I choose the word “lifestyle”. I am not dieting, I am changing my lifestyle. See the difference? I am no longer restricting myself, I am choosing to do things differently.
We all know that to become healthier you need to eat smart and move more. After one year of sitting on my ass due to injuries, I am revamping my lifestyle. While not restricting items from my life, I will work towards enjoying certain foods and/or drinks in moderation. More importantly, I am getting up and moving more.
So I declare 2016 to be my year of getting healthier and stronger…who’s with me?
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Jun 23, 2015 | Business owner, mom, Wellness, work from home mom, wraps
I am a child of God…
I am a wife…
I am a mother of two beautifully busy boys…
I am a mom to three fur babies…
I am a writer and believer in dreams…
I am a business owner and proud wrap girl…rockinthecrazywraps.
I am blessed!
