Whenever someone starts a sentence with ” I love my family, but”, you know whatever follows isn’t gonna be good.  In my case, it is true.  I love my husband, our two boys and three dogs with all my heart.  Chad is my best friend. He makes me a better person…blah blah blah…you have heard it before and you know exactly where I am going.  I am trying to justify what I am going to say  in regard to my family, without sounding like an ungrateful bitch.

But let’s do some REAL talk.

Why is it when couples have kids some crazy unidentified expectations come into play?  Why is it if HE watches the kids, he is babysitting.  Um,first of all, I didn’t have these babies by myself, and it seems like they are just as much YOURS?  How is that babysitting?  Am I babysitting when I have them 24/7?  No?   Because they are MY kids?  I call BS.

Mom or Maid?

Why there is dirty laundry on the stairs for three weeks before someone picks it up?  Of course, that someone is almost ALWAYS ME. Does no one else in this house see it or smell it?

My husband can cook which is a HUGE bonus for our family; but but as a result, every inch of the kitchen is covered with something sticky?

Why is it that NO ONE in this house knows how to do laundry except me?  Do we need to have Laundry 101?  And boys, your clothes do not magically go from the laundry room to your bedroom.  If you are running low on something, it is YOUR job to let me know.

Did you tell me you were out of underwear?  No?  When I ask for how long and you tell me three days, I am in awe.  eww!  No, I don’t want to hug you!  Get your butt in the shower!

Who taught you to put an empty box back in the pantry…and then question me as to why it isn’t full?  Did I know it was empty?  Of course not, you put it back in the pantry EMPTY!  If I don’t know it is empty, it doesn’t go on the list.

Um, football in the house?  I am pretty sure I told all of you to stop throwing the football in the house.  When something gets broke, it comes out of YOUR pocket.   well, crap, you just nailed me in the face and I am not sure how much that will cost you…good throw though, your arm is really getting strong!

Yes, you can have a puppy.  YOU are responsible for training and taking care of her though.  Fast forward two years and who walks her?  Feeds her?  Trains her?  Good question.

What’s a day off?

My husband lectured me the other day about wearing myself out.  He says I overextend myself and I need to stop doing that.


What happens when you take a day off?

This is what I return to…

A never ending amount of dirty dishes that need to be done.

More laundry that needs to be washed and put away.

An alarming amount of vacuuming that needs to happen.

The kids didn’t get their meds.

Or family house is a fricken disaster.

There is no dog food.

And finally, the garage door is broke.

Consequently, I am exhausted.

So, why don’t we take a day off?  Because it is hard to relax when we know our work will have doubled in the time we nap.  Fortunately my husband is not fanatical about the house being spotless, if he was, he would need to hire a maid.  I am pretty sure that title wasn’t in our marriage vows.

Want to do something nice for me honey?

Just a thought, buy me this and take the kids to a movie.

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AHHHHHHHHHHH!  While you are doing that, I will enjoy two hours of silence with no one to create a disaster…except the puppy and her pals and I can sound them out with some loud tunes. Seems like a win win situation for all of us.  After all, when mom is happy, so is her family.