by Cindi j Jeffrey | May 11, 2016 | Business owner, childhood, mom, work from home mom
Being a parent is similar to walking on a tightrope. You don’t want to overstep, loose your balance, or drop your ever important balancing stick. You hope you are providing your child with the tools to become confidant adults without losing your way. It’s a great thing that when we do fall, there is a safety net of others to pick up our slack.
My two boys are very different. It amazes me how two children, just 19 months apart can demonstrate such different characteristics! For one of my children, things come easily and he doesn’t seek out praise. My other child struggles with confidence issues and becomes easily frustrated, which leads to tears (I wish I could say he didn’t get this from me).
Today was a growth opportunity for that child. After a year of struggles in school, he tested well on reading. Actually, he breezed through six different reading levels this school year. In past years, he has chosen to be lacksidasical in his studies until the last quarter, where he would finish 3 quarters worth of work.
But I digress…tonight at Tae Kwando he began to cry when lost his way during a form. I immediately stood up and provided some encouragement from afar, wanting to go and hug him and knowing he needed to stay on the mat and finish his class.
From deep within, he mustered the courage to press on and completed the forms correctly. He stood taller and began to smile. He maintained that confidence throughout the class. As we left, we talked about how he felt class went, as we usually do. He talked of becoming frustrated and confused, however once he knew his expectations, he was able to bring it all together. I explained how proud I was of him that he stayed on the mat and even more importantly, he was proud that he stuck it out.
We both learned lessons tonight. He learned to trust himself and I learned to trust him. I thank God everyday for these little people and I pray that He will guide all of us through our journeys.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Apr 23, 2016 | Business owner, childhood, mom, work from home mom
Today’s world is so different from the world I grew up in. At the age of four, I was walking carefree and alone around our city block. By the time I was ten, my friends and I would walk across town to the mall. We spent our days outside and went hours without our parents hearing from us.
Today, I am afraid to let my boys play out front without an adult. There are reports of sexual predators attempting to lure kids into vans just blocks from our home. The news is packed with stories of shootings, attempted kidnappings, and other atrocious acts.
Some things have stayed the same though. There are still predators who are looking for their next victim. As a child I remember our family home being broken into. Although we locked the door, it was just a screen and was easily cut through. The thieves crawled right into my parents bedroom where they were sleeping and stole from us.
We had a peeping tom. I remember going out to look at the footprints in the mud outside of our downstairs window. Even with our home being violated, I still felt an essence of safety. Most of all, I remember the attack in the park bathroom when I was around the age of 7.
The city park boasted multiple play areas and a great river for fishing. Accompanied by my dad and older brother, I alternately played on the equipment and caught the trees with my fishing pole. When I told my dad that I had to use the bathroom, he instructed my brother to take me.
While he wasn’t overly happy about it, my brother walked me there as I chattered on and on about the fun we were having. When we reached the building, I attempted to open the heavy door and was unable to, so my brother assisted me in pushing it open…that was when we heard a piercing scream from a woman yelling “help me”!
Immediately my brother pulled me backwards and we let the door fall shut. Shortly after we moved out of the way, a man ran out. To this day I can tell you that he had dark hair, a white t-shirt, blue jeans and black boots. He also held a white cloth over his face.
My brother grabbed me and together we RAN back to where my dad was still fishing. As I was hysterical, my brother shared the story and we all piled into the truck so my dad could find a pay phone and call the police. During the drive around the park, we encountered the woman, now hanging over the river bank with blood dripping from her face. My dad let her know the police were in route.
I had to give my statement to the officers and we were free to go home. Home..where we had already been broken into…Home…where we had already been visited by a peeping Tom. Home…and a feeling of dread while wondering if I would ever be safe again.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Jan 27, 2016 | mom, school, work from home mom
We are defined by the words we associate with ourselves. I am a mommy. I melt when my boys say my name, even when it is the 400th time that day. I don’t take this position lightly. Allow me to address a situation that occurred in our life.
Earlier this week, my sensitive child came home from school thinking he was a “bad” boy. To say I was appalled is an understatement. Some of his classmates had been having difficulty and acting out and he was put into what he perceived to be the “bad” group.
He was visibly upset, as this is the child who follows the rules. He is kind to everyone, particularly those who don’t have many friends. He tries to maintain the status quo and doesn’t do a lot to stand out. He often fails to do his own work when a classmate asks him for help. I will not say that he hasn’t broken the rules, as he has. He has made some poor decisions, as we all have.
So for him to share that he was a “bad” boy was unacceptable. It is so easy to put someone down yet so hard to build them back up. His dad and I spent quite a bit of time talking with him about our expectations for him. I wish I could say this was the first time this has happened, but it isn’t. In the past we have had to talk with him about how he perceives the actions of others in regard to the reality of those actions.
For a sensitive child, overlooking positive behavior is detrimental. Even if he performs well, he relies on the feedback of others to feel better. A sensitive child does not have the internal drive that guides him do complete his work, or stay in his seat…he will always follow his inclination to help a classmate who needs assistance or to worry about everyone else.
It crushes my child if you forget to greet him in the morning. We work very hard on the way to school to prepare for the day and when he leaves the car to walk into the school, the direction of his day can often be determined by how high he holds his head.
He isn’t consistent in his work. Plese don’t ever confuse that with his level of intelligence. He doesn’t forget ANYTHING. His capacity for work is contingent upon how he feels about himself, OR how he feels about you, as his teacher. If there isn’t a connection, he will probably not perform at his highest. It takes him time to trust you and that trust is earned in regard to your interactions with him and with others.
He is a watcher. He notices who is in trouble and who does well. He notices that he has never been picked as student of the week. He tries to please you, and when you fail to acknowledge that, he will stop trying. As he begins to fall behind, he feels overwhelmed and eventually will stop trying.
He is 7. He needs to play. He needs a break from being “busy”. He needs to run and be silly. While he may not be as athletic as other boys, he loves to be around everyone. He is learning that he can’t throw a ball as good as someone else, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to.
There are things he excels at. Please take the time to ask him what he likes. It may take 2 minutes from your day, but I promise you, it will mean the world to him. Ask him how he feels and you will learn more about him that you ever knew. Don’t categorize him or any other child, for you only see the tip of who they are.
It hurts me to watch him walk into school when he feels like a “bad” boy. He is a little boy and he is still learning. I know that you have many students to watch over and you have an integral job of guiding who they will become. I understand that your day is chaotic and your job is sometimes thankless. Please take a moment and acknowledge my child as a person, as a little boy who wants to please you, as a little boy who is learning. We are trusting you to guide our child, please don’t take that lightly.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Jan 16, 2016 | mom, Wellness, work from home mom
I refuse to diet…after all if you look closely at the word, the first three letters are D I E. In my opinion, diets are a set up for failure. If your mind works like mine, once you try to restrict something from your life, that is all you will begin to think about.
I choose the word “lifestyle”. I am not dieting, I am changing my lifestyle. See the difference? I am no longer restricting myself, I am choosing to do things differently.
We all know that to become healthier you need to eat smart and move more. After one year of sitting on my ass due to injuries, I am revamping my lifestyle. While not restricting items from my life, I will work towards enjoying certain foods and/or drinks in moderation. More importantly, I am getting up and moving more.
So I declare 2016 to be my year of getting healthier and stronger…who’s with me?
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Nov 9, 2015 | Business owner, work from home mom
I wasn’t looking to own a multi level marketing business. I especially had no desire to delve into one like It Works. I was the epitome of a skeptic, I didn’t do sales, and I couldn’t see myself being successful. Imagine my surprise when after praying to God, researching and talking with my husband, I became a proud owner of my own MLM business. The following “confessions” are a result of some soul searching that I did last week. As with anything, businesses also go into slumps and I have been knee deep in one! So let me share with you some heartfelt thoughts.
😳 I have a confession.
I am vain.
I totally get that I will never be a size 5 again and while I am OK with that, I want to be STRONG 💪and HEALTHY.
I love that the wraps help me tighten tone and firm my skin.
I love that our skin care line helps minimize sun🌞 damage and wrinkles.
I love the supplements that give me energy and the nutrients 🍏🍉🍇🍊🍋🍅🍓🍒my body craves to be healthier.
So when I ask you if you want to try the products, it is not because I think you necessarily NEED them, it is because I truly WANT you to feel as good as I do.
I have never met someone who didn’t want to look or feel better.
After all, when you feel better, you are more confident.
Who doesn’t want that?
Confession #2:
I still get scared👀 to ask you to join my team.
I overthink.
I talk myself out of asking.
I am afraid of rejection.😥
There…it is out there and I am moving on. The best way to overcome fear is by letting it go.🌬
Confession #3
I will not apologize for what I do. I am so fortunate to have my MLM business. The 9-5 doesn’t work for my family at this time…we made the choice for me to stay home after the boys were born. I loved it, however I missed bringing in some income💸 and communicating with other adults.
So, I will continue to work, I will continue to ask, I will continue to post. I will surround myself with people who support me and my dreams.
I absolutely love these plant based products and I truly believe there is something for everyone. So thank you for your support. I am incredibly blessed.💚💚
I am vain
I am afraid
I am proud
My confessions are true. They were also my way of dispelling some of the myths surrounding what I do.
While there are weight loss supplements, the wraps are NOT one of them. They are an amazing skin care treatment to tighten, tone and firm on any area of your body.
The facial line is amazing. I was a clinique user for years and was reluctant to make the switch. I still love Clinique, but now I love It Works even more.
When I started my business I was terrified. Terrified of what you would say, terrified that people would judge me, terrified to reach out to you. That fear continues to minimize as I see the benefits of the products AND the business. The confidence I have found within me is amazing and it is due to ongoing self growth, being surrounded by people who lift me up and being blessed by God.
I am incredibly proud to be an It Works Distributor. This decision totally changed my life.
So when I ask you to try a product, it is because I know the benefit I obtained. When I ask you to join my team, it is because I believe you would be amazing at this business. I see something in you that you may not even see in yourself yet.
Thank you for believing.
It took courage for me to do so and admit to be afraid. After all, fear is not something we often talk about. Let me go even further…this past month has been very difficult for me and my business. I have prayed often and put on a happy face for everyone around me. Businesses are hard. There will be peaks and valleys and for me, those peaks hit a little harder last month.
I am in it for the long hall and I am not a quitter. I absolutely LOVE these products and if I didn’t feel so strongly, I wouldn’t be promoting them. Funks are short lived and we all need to remember that if we don’t take chances, we will never know what we are capable of. Remember that the next time someone asks you to try a product or join their company. For you, it may be annoying, for them, it is one way to pay their bills and increase their confidence.
by Cindi j Jeffrey | Aug 12, 2015 | work from home mom
And so it begins.
Both boys are in school for full days.
What is a stay at home mom to do?
Start her next chapter.
My book is far from finished and every chapter continues to bring new challenges and incredible memories.
When I was younger, I could never see myself married, let alone be a mom. And God forbid that I would ever be a stay at home mom! I was a career woman and after graduating from college with a degree in Social Work (I was NEVER going to be a social worker either, lol) I worked several jobs, enjoyed an active social life and thought I was happy.
It wasn’t until I was in my 30’s that I began to see life differently. The love of my life and I had been dating on and off since high school and we decided to make it official and move onto our first chapter together.
We did everything that married people are supposed to do; we worked hard, got an amazing dog, and build a home. Parenting was something we were both interested in pursing, yet not in a huge rush to make it happen.
When it did, it turned our lives upside down. As a woman of “advanced maternal age”, my pregnancy was not easy and our first son was delivered three weeks early. After a stay in the NICU, we brought him home and I can vividly remember all three of us lying in our bedroom wondering what to do next. I had separated my pelvis during birth, so Daddy took care of both of us. I also remember wondering if I would ever be able to bond with my baby, as I didn’t feel that maternal instinct that everyone talked about. While I waited for it to magically appear, Daddy and Zach developed an amazing bond.
When it came time to go back to work, I was devastated to leave my baby. Apparently the maternal bond creeped up on me and now I couldn’t imagine leaving him with anyone else. I tried going back to work part-time, but in the end, it wasn’t for me. I desperately missed my baby and I did not want to miss any of his developmental milestones.
As it turns out, we ended up moving to another state and we made the decision for me to stay at home with the baby. While it sounded like an amazing opportunity, I truly had a tough time with the transition. We were in a new home, a new town, and I was home alone with an infant who relied on me for everything. I loved him so much it hurt, however I really did struggle with the shift in thinking and the change of responsibilities. I was used to working like a madwoman and going 100 miles per hour and now I did a lot of sitting and it felt as though I wasn’t doing much of anything. Life had slowed down tremendously and at the same time it began to feel as though it was moving at turbo speed.
When Zach was 11 months, we discovered we were blessed yet again. This time I remember wondering how I was going to share my love with another baby. I loved Zach with my whole heart and I questioned if I had enough room for two? Hormones really can be cruel, as I began to second guess my ability to parent two children.
With another difficult pregnancy, Zach continued to grow into an amazing toddler. The first night I left him alone was when we went to deliver his little brother. As it happens, my husband had taken a job in another state and had to cut his first day of work short so he could be there for the delivery of our second son.
Again, a short stay in the NICU and we brought baby Kyler home. Zach was pissed! He wanted nothing to do with the little bundle and made it very apparent that mommy was his, not the baby’s.
One of my strongest memories at this time was of me laying in bed and holding two screaming little ones. Neither was happy, daddy was gone during the week, and I was just spent. I felt guilty that the house was a disaster, the dogs were neglected, and I felt as though I wasn’t being a good mom to the boys. Again, I blame the hormones.
Six month later we moved again and life began to take on a new rhythm. Zach started paying attention to Kyler, I was able to focus on both boys, and I began to find some confidence as a mom.
Today I look back on those memories and wonder where the time went. This year, Kyler started kindergarten and Zach began 2nd grade. My babies are growing at an alarming rate and when time used to go so slowly, today it races.
God has truly blessed us with some amazing children. I learn more from them than they could ever learn from me. I love when they discover something new and I try hard to stop when they want to show me something. I have a collection of rocks and pictures that hold incredible memories that make me smile and give me warm fuzzies.
So as my boys go off to school today, I thank God for changing my thinking and giving me the opportunity be a stay at home mom. I can’t wait to pick them up from school and hear about their day, while I sneak in a kiss and a hug…I hope they hold my hand as we walk back to our car…after all, in another year or two, even that will be too much to ask.
Until I pick them up, maybe a few m&m’s will fill the empty part of me…couldn’t hurt, could it?
